'Twas the evening of Tuesday, and up in the tub

Shelf Elf was indulging in a scrub a dub dub

When Plum Pudding arrived and took of her clothes

And helped Shelf Elf bathe from her head to her toes...

Then gleefully out of the hot tub they pranced

To the cold bathroom floor where she unzipped her pants

When the foreplay began, on Elf's face Plum sat

Shelf Elf never removing her holiday hat

Boundaries were broken and salads were tossed

If Santa could see her, all trust would be lost

If Lovin Plum was wrong, she didn't want to be right

So with reckless abandon, they scissored all night.